Ugh

May. 8th, 2014 08:20 pm
deathpixie: (Default)
So, half-way through the timeline for the move, where my area of responsibility gets transferred to another ministry and I get left behind to be and office lackey and odd-job girl. I'm exhausted, since not only do I have my regular job to do, but I'm also collating, inventorying, packing and generating lists, all on my own. It's a great time, I can tell you. By late afternoon my brain shuts down and I lose all ability to nuance. I've been hopeless with responding to things, and even trying to think of something to do for my birthday this weekend was too hard - I went with baseball, because it's a fun afternoon out without too many social demands.

I'll be so glad when this is done. Except then I'll have nothing to do and no reason to be there. With a government cutting everything back down to the bone. Yay. And you all know how much I love being superfluous.

Any way. Leeway is good if I say something dumb. I barely know my own name atm. And I'm off to have a bath, where it doesn't matter what my name is.

Edit: Definitely going for that bath. Just got news that Dad's knee surgery didn't go as smoothly as it should have and he's still in recovery for another night after not getting enough oxygen while he was out. Going offline so I don't get my worry all over everyone.
deathpixie: (plateaus of sanity)
Work totally kicked my arse today. I know I have approximately a gazillion logs atm, but you'll have to wait for me to reply tomorrow. Brain go bye-bye, sorry!

Bed now - it's late enough that I won't wake up at 5 in the morning.
deathpixie: (humans suck)
Apparently I woke up on the wrong side of the bed, although having nightmares about demonically-possessed kids and having a cat periodically come into your room to meow pathetically until you wake up before leaving again will do that for you.

I also have a touch of heartburn again, which means I'm going to have to be super careful about what I eat and drink today, the chicken stew I was going to take for lunch today (being nice and non-offensive to heartburn) wasn't there when I looked for it, there was a rather brusque email in my inbox this morning that's bugging me and I'm just generally annoyed at things in general. Plus I got up early to dry my hair for a photoshoot that's on Wednesday now.

So, I'm going to go downstairs, get myself a carton of milk, a yoghurt parfait for breakfast and see if there's any antacids available, and then I'm going to come back and do my grounding exercises and hope the grr dies down, mostly because it's not good for the heartburn either. No coffee or Coke today, which means I'll probably get sleepy and headachy by this afternoon, but I shall just have to deal.

I'll also send off my glasses receipt to my insurance company, which ought to help - impending money always does. Oh, and I need to remember to transfer money to my credit card - it ought to be there in my account by now.
deathpixie: (honesty the best policy)
Grabbed from my mate [Bad username or site: @ livejournal.com] in the LJ equivalent of an RT:

Coping with burn out. It's got some helpful advice.

And in other news, so want to go home. Feel horrible - head cold is attempting a hostile takeover of my bronchitis-weakened lungs, bah.

Edit: My lawyer hates me and wants me to die. He's going to dictate a letter for me to finish before I can go home. At 4:30. p.m. Im so going to cough all over him. *grumps*

Yeah.

Sep. 17th, 2009 02:19 pm
deathpixie: (creature of grace)
Not getting anything useful done today. Turning off the 'Net for a bit and going and doing something Not At Home tonight.
deathpixie: (grr)
Something's triggering my angry/upset reactions today and I'm still trying to work out exactly what it is and deal with it. Just as a warning if I seem snappy.
deathpixie: (one day I'll fly away)
So, tomorrow I'll be offline as I'm going to a memorial service. Friday I'll be mostly offline during the day since I have to inventory the library at work. [Bad username or site: @ livejournal.com] is offline tonight and tomorrow.

I'll catch you all on the weekend, I guess. Or tonight.

Edit: One good thing? Cell phone is back up and running. Yay me.
deathpixie: (hand)
Woke from way too vivid dreams about hostages and explosives and killing someone with a screwdriver to people being dumb and a letter for my 'favourite' nutcase defendant. This does not bode well for the day.
deathpixie: (grumpy)
Bad start to the morning with various emergencies at work that required flailing, plus I have Alvin in and at his nitpicky best. Add to that a bad night for the sleeping - several cat fights on the bed, waking up every ten minutes, stupid dreams, that sort of thing - and I'm apparently in a crappy mood with little to no patience. So, given I tend to snap when I'm like this with little provocation, I'm probably going to be quiet for the day. Yay for things being quiet game-wise, at least.

I should go have lunch. Food always helps.

Edit: Huh.
deathpixie: (grumpy)
Day two of a skull crushing headache due to sinus issues from the 'flu, although this time it's switched sides. This and the lack of pain killers in our apartment that don't knock me out is making me tetchy. And despite going to bed at 5 p.m. yesterday, being woken for dinner and then sleeping again, I'm still feeling like crap. So yeah, no poking me today - I'm liable to snap at people.

Also, my paid account expired and I'm down to six icons. Thank you, anonymous donor. It wasn't a hint, but I appreciate the gift.
deathpixie: (grumpy)
The roomie is sick with the Cold from Hell and from the stuffy nose, scratchy throat and sinus pressure, it's possible I'm getting it too. Whee. At least it's on a Sunday where I can sleep until noon and then hang around in my PJs on the couch all day?
deathpixie: (afraid of love)
I don't often do this, but I really need distracting today. Emails, comments, links to things that aren't YouTube (since I can't open that at work), things to read, memes, whatever. If I owe you an email, ping me and remind me and I'll get on that now. Stuff to get me out of my own head would be appreciated today.
deathpixie: (WTF?)
I've just found a cellphone in our couch cushions. A Motorola and the battery is dead or we'd look to see who's address book it is. So if you've been to our house since Thursday (which is when we turned the couch upside down looking for Dex's phone, which has been found now, yay), can you let us know if it's yours?
deathpixie: (kitty)
Anyone got space for this little guy? He was abandoned in an apartment when the owners left, and he desperately needs a home, preferably without other cats/lots of room since he's a bit skittish. If you're unable to take him, try spreading the word?
deathpixie: (crossed wires)
So, on doctor's orders, I've switched taking my meds from the evening to the morning, to combat that whole "can't wake up in the morning issue". After a fun few days (especially yesterday, where I was back right in the Slough of Despond bigtime), I seem to be adjusting to the change. Not only was I at work early (5 minutes early, in fact), I'm awake, alert and functioning, which is a considerable improvement on things.

Babble about guilt and triggers )
deathpixie: (Default)
The roomie was right with his estimate - 11:00 a.m. and the insomnia of last night caught up with me. Coffee for the win.

I don't normally have trouble getting to sleep - staying asleep, yes, since there's some nights I swear I could hear feathers landing on the floor, just about - but every so often insomnia strikes and last night was one of those. Didn't help it was already 1:45 a.m. when I got to bed, although I don't regret the time spent watching season 2 of Dead Like Me with the roomie and [Bad username or site: @ livejournal.com] and being on the receiving end of a kitty pile at one point. But yeah, got to bed and discovered that sleep, she was eluding me. Mostly due to the low-level simmering anger I'd had all night - yay public criticism triggering buttons on an already-cranky day.

Just a general note to folks? If you want to point out something you feel I've done wrong, or could do better? Freaking well email me directly, at least at the moment. You'll get a much less neurotic response, and constructive things will be achieved, as I did with Sil yesterday, as opposed to the gigantic bundle of "OhMyGodISuck" I wound up yesterday. I'm working on the central issue, but given the number of issues I am working on atm, that one has to take a number and sit in the waiting room.

But yeah, insomnia last night. I wound up going to go sleep on the couch, since a) my computer was there and I could play music, which sometimes helps take my mind off racing thoughts, and b) sometimes a change of scene can trigger the sleepy reaction. It mostly worked, although the cats managed to wake me several times with knocking stuff over. Little bastards are working their way to being a pair of fur-lined boots, I swear. I think I've had... four hours? of sleep? Something like that. Await the crash in the afternoon, that's all I can say. At least I'm not hungover to go with it.

Good things, since I'm working on that positive reinforcement...

1) I didn't lose my temper online yesterday, and managed to tamp down a potentially list-wide blah situation;

2) People pinged me to check I was okay;

3) I practiced guitar last night, and did pretty well. Lesson tonight.

4) I look pretty today, even with the coldsores from the flu. The little swishy skirt and my red cardigan are always a good combination.

5) I got a bunch of work done yesterday, including various outstanding things from last week's absence. My decks are now almost clear - I just need to write a motion for January 28.
deathpixie: (grumpy)
I'm not sure why, but everything is irritating the crap out of me today.

My bath of last night had the reverse effect intended - instead of feeling better, I felt horrible, all cold and achey and tired, so I missed band night and wound up in bed, cuddling the wall heating vent all night despite the thick duvet and the pyjama pants I had on. And I'm still not great today - the flu is apparently doing a last stand against my immune system. Yay for feelings of isolation and guilt brought on by the fact I'm too damn sick to do anything or talk to anyone. Including my roommate last night - there were maybe five words exchanged as he got up out of bed and I was heading towards mine.

Counselling... eh. Wasn't bad, wasn't good, just was. I at least walked home, tho'.

Work... I had to send Natasha a second email, justifying why I should be given access to a certain computer system that we use for records, since I have to get other people to add any new files for Alvin or Jane and it's annoying to them and to me. Apparently "so I can do my job properly" wasn't good enough. God I hate bureaucracy and pedantry sometimes. *grfs* And it doesn't help every time I get settled into something, someone interrupts me, and not even with 'important' things, stupid little computer-related issues that because I'm not a technical moron, I'm apparently the source of all answers.

Various other things are bugging me as well, nothing major in and of itself, but all culminating to make me cranky and exasperated and irritable. And snappish. Yay. I'm starting to think the best option might be to turn off anything resembling inter-communication and go do my filing, before I bite someone's head off more than I already have.

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