Never trust an Australian...

[deathpixie]

Words of wisdom from Lennie of [Bad username or site: @ livejournal.com]:

*If any of you are planning on visiting this lovely country in the future, these are the rules - pronounce place names exactly as they are spoken to you. Brisbane, Melbourne and anything with lots of o's in it are particular problems. Do not add new words to your vocabulary on anybody's say-so. And I mean anybody. I've seen people tell close friends and relatives incorrect, out of date or offensive things with a perfectly straight face. It's the unofficial national sport, and Americans are the easiest to fool since there are fewer shared words and speech patterns that with other English-speaking countries. (It's no fun with people who aren't native English speakers.) So even if you go up to a complete stranger, policeman, waitress or whoever they'll most likely back up whatever outrageous thing you got told. Particularly if it's about the wildlife. Signs warning about wildlife should always be taken very seriously, though.

***

And now off to work for me. The boss was optimistic and put me on until 2pm. We'll see how long that lasts.

Comments

[one-bat.livejournal.com]

But the dropbears are so dangerous (not actually bears tho)....seriously. They are a carnivourous relative of the Koala bear (also not actually a bear) The lurk in the treetops and attack their prey by falling onto them and attacking their heads and necks. You have to be careful in the Australian bush. The hoop snakes will chase you too, out in the desert. They travel over the searing hot sand by clasping their tails in their own mouths, and using their unique musculature to travel at speed of up to about 10km/hr.

Honest

:-)

[annlarimer.livejournal.com]

A drop bear killed my father.

No. Wait. Heart attack.

[yonaelka.livejournal.com]

Well . .. Annette was from Brisbane, and I think NG as well . .. Briz-buhn? That's how they pronounced it . . .

Dave's from Western Australia, not entirely sure where, but he says Mel-bun and the Kiwis in the house say Mil-bun (they also say sivvin instead of seven).

Oooh! Reminds me of the rattlesnake girls.

[http://users.livejournal.com/_bounce_/]

I was rockpooling down at this beach near Sorrento a couple of weeks ago and Kate was showing me all the cool things in rockpools, right? Crabs and things (and OMG! There were toadfishies! And they were so little and cute!) and these girls were tagging along with us and getting scared by the crabs and things when they hear this buzzing noise and since Kate's done her whole "I'm a marine biologist and I can tell you that that's a really cute ickle male crab thing" they ask her what it is. "Is that noise rattlesnakes?"

Kate was all "No. Those cicadas. You don't get rattlesnakes in Australia."
They were serious, too and they weren't that young. They were like, my age and they were Australian, too.

[pollymel.livejournal.com]

Melbourne and Brisbane rhyme. *grins*

[pollymel.livejournal.com]

Sometimes they're easy to get confused.

[(Anonymous)]

Ya see.. thats the clever thing. The surprise of being dropped on, and the terror that ensues is often the cause of the heart attack. Most M.E.'s attribute the animal damage incorrectly to Post Moretem anaimal attack. Cunning little buggers.

Re: Oooh! Reminds me of the rattlesnake girls.

[one-bat.livejournal.com]

No.. no rattlesnakes. But we do have i think 7 of the top 10 most poisonous snakes, Redback Spiders (http://www.austmus.gov.au/factsheets/redback.htm)
, Funnelweb Spiders (http://www.austmus.gov.au/factsheets/funnelweb.htm)
, Stonefish (http://www.amonline.net.au/fishes/students/focus/sverruc.htm)
, all sorts of real things that are kinda nasty. It's fun. Keeps us on our toes.

[one-bat.livejournal.com]

That'll teach me to log in first next time.

Re: Oooh! Reminds me of the rattlesnake girls.

[http://users.livejournal.com/_bounce_/]

*laughs* I know. I still think 18 or twenty year olds should know that they only exist in America.

Re: Oooh! Reminds me of the rattlesnake girls.

[one-bat.livejournal.com]

Yes indeed. Altho I have noticed what I consider general knowledge lacking in those of that age lately. It's a little sad really. Do NOT get me started on vocabulary. *expletive ramble*

Re: Oooh! Reminds me of the rattlesnake girls.

[http://users.livejournal.com/_bounce_/]

It's insane. I tutor highschool kids (usually ones in their last two years of school) and you wouldn't believe the basic grammatical mistakes and things like that that they make. Or the vocab issues. ESL kids at least know their grammar but English native speakers seem to have these incredible holes in their general knowledge. Things like 'its' and 'it's' and basic punctuation and using abbreviations and capitalising proper nouns...

You also should not have to tell someone going into year 12 that you don't write your essay entirely in capital letters. Just, no.

Re: Oooh! Reminds me of the rattlesnake girls.

[one-bat.livejournal.com]

I had a converstaion with a 21 year old recently, who did not know what the words Gesticulate, Paradox or Paradigm meant. She was 3rd year uni educated. How does this happen?