Rossi (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
deathpixie) wrote2001-03-23 10:20 am
deathpixie) wrote2001-03-23 10:20 am
Unspecified Bug - 1, Rossi - 0
Yep, my immune system has finally packed it in and I'm taking the day off work. Bah; first week back full time and I end up piking on the Friday. But it was such an effort to wake up today - BRM ended up knocking on my door to see if I was awake (I wasn't) - and the cough is getting worse, so I decided a day spent quietly drinking lots of fluids will mean a much healthier Rossi on Monday. I'm probably going to end up snoozing on the couch soonish; I'm so tired still, I'm having trouble keeping my eyes open.
I hate being sick; it always feels like a betrayal of some sort. I've always been pretty healthy, and so when the inevitable happens and I come down with something, I take it as a personal affront. Not that I can complain; there's a lot of people out there who don't have the health to start with and so are always sick. But I don't like it. *pout*
It's unbelievable how cold it's gotten over the last few days - it actually snowed at Falls Creek on Wednesday. I sat and shivered all day yesterday at work (although that could have been the Bug - I was wearing my jacket, and it's pretty warm) and riding home my knees just about froze off. *grins* Which would have made pedalling a lot harder, having no knees. ;)
I've been reading more books on wrting, and I'm getting the impetus to have another go at "LIttle Kings" (or at least that's what it's called this week!); I haven't done anything on it since the move, being busy wit fic-type stuff. I know I can write, so it's just a matter of sitting my lazy butt down and not turning on the modem. :P
Speaking of which, I'm still having a financial dilemma. I really need to upgrade, although Tosh seems to be working better up here, but I want to go to DexCon too. I'm not even sure I can afford either, with this part-time salary. Possibly DexCon, but not the computer this year - G4 cubes cost around $3000, and that's without the screen, which I would need to get as well. I have almost $2000 in my living bank account, thanks to the fact I've had no life since moving up here :P, but there's still stuff I want to do, like the trip to Sydney this Easter, and weapons camp at the end of April - I sent a cheque off for that yesterday.
I really want to go to DexCon, take a bit more time this time so I don't have to rush off. The fic community are in some ways my closest friends at the moment (which is not entirely a good thing, but there it is), and I want to be able to see my friends in person, talk to them without staying up until silly hours and without typos. But I'm not sure if I can justify the expense. *sighs* I know I gave myself until June to decide, but with the state the Aussie dollar's in, I'm starting to feel like I have to do something soon, or it will cost me twice as much. I'm just hoping flight prices drop because people can't afford to travel.
It would help if I knew for certain why I want to go. To see my friends, sure, but I'm wondering if it would just be a way to get back at BRM - take off overseas, flirt outrageously (as I'm prone to do when I'm with people I'm happy to be with), and enjoy myself when he's probably going to need some kind of financial support to get through this year. I *know* I don't have to, that since we've broken up, any financial claims he has on me are null and void, but this year is important for him, and I know he'll pay me back next year when he's teaching. And damnit all to hell, I just can't change the way I feel about him. We've been together so long - it's become second nature to look out for each other, like this morning when he called work for me to tell Paula I wasn't coming in. Little things, big things... there's so much between us, I can't even begin to untangle it.
Sometimes I wish someone would make the decisions for me. I've always been the one to decide stuff, the organiser, and it's getting old. Where's the lucky 8-ball when I need it? ;P
I hate being sick; it always feels like a betrayal of some sort. I've always been pretty healthy, and so when the inevitable happens and I come down with something, I take it as a personal affront. Not that I can complain; there's a lot of people out there who don't have the health to start with and so are always sick. But I don't like it. *pout*
It's unbelievable how cold it's gotten over the last few days - it actually snowed at Falls Creek on Wednesday. I sat and shivered all day yesterday at work (although that could have been the Bug - I was wearing my jacket, and it's pretty warm) and riding home my knees just about froze off. *grins* Which would have made pedalling a lot harder, having no knees. ;)
I've been reading more books on wrting, and I'm getting the impetus to have another go at "LIttle Kings" (or at least that's what it's called this week!); I haven't done anything on it since the move, being busy wit fic-type stuff. I know I can write, so it's just a matter of sitting my lazy butt down and not turning on the modem. :P
Speaking of which, I'm still having a financial dilemma. I really need to upgrade, although Tosh seems to be working better up here, but I want to go to DexCon too. I'm not even sure I can afford either, with this part-time salary. Possibly DexCon, but not the computer this year - G4 cubes cost around $3000, and that's without the screen, which I would need to get as well. I have almost $2000 in my living bank account, thanks to the fact I've had no life since moving up here :P, but there's still stuff I want to do, like the trip to Sydney this Easter, and weapons camp at the end of April - I sent a cheque off for that yesterday.
I really want to go to DexCon, take a bit more time this time so I don't have to rush off. The fic community are in some ways my closest friends at the moment (which is not entirely a good thing, but there it is), and I want to be able to see my friends in person, talk to them without staying up until silly hours and without typos. But I'm not sure if I can justify the expense. *sighs* I know I gave myself until June to decide, but with the state the Aussie dollar's in, I'm starting to feel like I have to do something soon, or it will cost me twice as much. I'm just hoping flight prices drop because people can't afford to travel.
It would help if I knew for certain why I want to go. To see my friends, sure, but I'm wondering if it would just be a way to get back at BRM - take off overseas, flirt outrageously (as I'm prone to do when I'm with people I'm happy to be with), and enjoy myself when he's probably going to need some kind of financial support to get through this year. I *know* I don't have to, that since we've broken up, any financial claims he has on me are null and void, but this year is important for him, and I know he'll pay me back next year when he's teaching. And damnit all to hell, I just can't change the way I feel about him. We've been together so long - it's become second nature to look out for each other, like this morning when he called work for me to tell Paula I wasn't coming in. Little things, big things... there's so much between us, I can't even begin to untangle it.
Sometimes I wish someone would make the decisions for me. I've always been the one to decide stuff, the organiser, and it's getting old. Where's the lucky 8-ball when I need it? ;P