Day-long cases and boys on bikes.
Jul. 17th, 2001 06:20 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
deathpixieThe boys first, since I'm fresh from watching the update from Le Tour on TV. *dances happily* Amazing stuff - Brad McGee, racing his first Tour and not that long switched from track racing to road racing, came third in today's stage. What makes it even better is that he's moved up from being practically last (168th place) to 148th overall.
Stewie (Stuart O'Grady) came sixth in today's stage, beaten by Eric Zabel, but still retaining both the yellow jersey of the overall leader of Le Tour, but the green sprinter's jersey he won yesterday. There's a four minute gap between him and the next placed person, but then a twenty minute gap to the rest of the field, so hopefully he'll hold the yellow a few more days yet, even with the Alps imminent.
It's a great Tour for the two Aussies. :)
***
Yet another long court day, although this one was expected, so I was more able to deal with it. Even only getting only twenty minutes for lunch wasn't so bad - I wasn't as hungry as I usually am, for some reason - because I knew it had to be done. We had a day-long contest (a not guilty plea to an indecent assault charge) booked in, but unfortunately someone forgot to cancel the ordinary mention cases, and we ended up with a huge list. We adjourned most of it, dealt with the rest, adn were ready for the contest by 11.30 (court starts 9.30-10.00am). Only the prosecutor decides to throw a tantrum.
Prosecutors in the Magistrates' Court are police members who have legal training. Rob, our usual bloke, was off sick today, and so we had Sgt Bob, one of the two Wangaratta prosecutors. He's a nice bloke, but a bloody sloppy worker - he didn't even realise we had a day-long contest until we told him. He hadn't looked at the file (which he'd had since the day before) or anything. So he asks for a brief adjournment, to talk to the witnesses, and then disappears. For half a bloody hour.
We finally started the case shortly before one pm (which is when lunch starts). We got through half the victim's evidence before she needed a break, and I bolted over to the supermarket for a frozen vegetable pastie and a packet soup (thanks be to microwaves!). The afternoon went pretty well, with the usual defence tactic of discrediting the victim, and then two more of the prosecution's five witnesses. Meanwhile, Peter managed to clear most of tomorrow's list, and we'll be continuing the case then.
It's interesting, really, this case. The accused was a friend of the victim, staying with her in the bungalow out the back of her house after separating from his wife. He says they actually had a sexual relationship, and that she has fabricated the assault story out of jealousy of his new (Internet) relationship. She denies this completely, saying she has never had sex with him, and that he was pursuing her despite her rebuffals: the incident in question involved him throwing her onto her bed, pushing up her shirt and undoing her bra and kissing her breasts. The accused looks like a retired book keeper, and the victim is a large woman (also divorced) possibly in her early forties. To me, it's a situation of two sad, lonely people, and one of them is under some kind of delusion about the other. Which one, though, remains to be seen. I'm waiting for the rest of the evidence tomorrow.
I had another of those interesting chats with Mr Hardy (the magistrate), he who calls our Prime Minister The Pissant (almost as good as The Gnome, IMO). He was talking about job-related stress, and why he feels less stressed as a magistrate than he did as a defence lawyer. It was, he told me, about control. As a lawyer, he had no control - the decision was in the hands of the judicial members he appeared before, and all he could do was give his clients as good a chance as he could. As a magistrate, he has a degree of that control. I had to agree with him about that - the most stressful times of my job are when things are going pear-shaped, and I can't do anything about it. It's the solicitors, the police, the defendants and applicants and witnesses, and the magistrates themselves: it's like herding cats in the dark, sometimes.
I readily admit to being something of a control freak. It's part of the Eldest Child Syndrome (ECS). *winks at Yas and promises to explain that one to everyone else some other time* What I hate most is not having control over my life, feeling helpless and frustrated. ECS is also why I hate seeing my friends in trouble, and not being able to help them - I need to be useful, and I have a large nurturing streak.
But I'm distracting myself.
I think what's driving me nuts the most about this year is the feeling of not being entirely in control - too many decisions seem to have been made for me, or by me but for the sake of other people. It's why, I think, I need my own space so much, to live on my own for a while and not have to factor in other people as much as I have. In thirty years, I've never really lived on my own - the closest I got was in college, and there was always someone next door or down the hall or whatever. And I didn't have to make my own meals. *grins*
I remembered a quote on my ride home tonight, thinking this over: "I'd rather be alone for the right reasons, than with someone for the wrong ones." It's paraphrased from Some Kind Of Wonderful, one of those John Hughes Eighties teen flicks. It's a personal favourite of mine, along with The Breakfast Club.
At this moment, that quote holds true for me. I'd rather be right, and strong, then wrong and weak. Because that kind of decision is not only harmful to me, it hurts the person I'm with, be it BRM or Michael or even my parents. It gives me too many excuses to shy away from the hard decisions, gives me a scapegoat for the bad ones. And if I'm going to be the kind of person people think I am, then it's up to me to stop taking the easy path of excuses and justifications and prevarication.
***
Since I didn't do this last Sunday (being on my way back from Melbourne in a stressed-out Mini), here's this week's Gratitude Journal:
Five Things I'm Grateful For:
1) That I got to see Yasmin, even if it wasn't for long, and that I'll be able to see her again next week before I fly out.
2) The amazing sunset I watched Sunday evening, driving home.
3) That BRM isn't the type of person to leave me with nothing when he leaves at the end of the year, and that we're able to talk about stuff like property division without the bullshit I see in court.
4) The yummy packet Tom Yum (*chuckles* sounds like a Mel thing) soup I got from the supermarket today for lunch.
5) The way people feel they can talk to me about what's bothering them, and ask my advice, even though I may not have a clue. ;)
***
Getting on for dinner time, and this post is already huge. I'll catch you later. :)
Stewie (Stuart O'Grady) came sixth in today's stage, beaten by Eric Zabel, but still retaining both the yellow jersey of the overall leader of Le Tour, but the green sprinter's jersey he won yesterday. There's a four minute gap between him and the next placed person, but then a twenty minute gap to the rest of the field, so hopefully he'll hold the yellow a few more days yet, even with the Alps imminent.
It's a great Tour for the two Aussies. :)
***
Yet another long court day, although this one was expected, so I was more able to deal with it. Even only getting only twenty minutes for lunch wasn't so bad - I wasn't as hungry as I usually am, for some reason - because I knew it had to be done. We had a day-long contest (a not guilty plea to an indecent assault charge) booked in, but unfortunately someone forgot to cancel the ordinary mention cases, and we ended up with a huge list. We adjourned most of it, dealt with the rest, adn were ready for the contest by 11.30 (court starts 9.30-10.00am). Only the prosecutor decides to throw a tantrum.
Prosecutors in the Magistrates' Court are police members who have legal training. Rob, our usual bloke, was off sick today, and so we had Sgt Bob, one of the two Wangaratta prosecutors. He's a nice bloke, but a bloody sloppy worker - he didn't even realise we had a day-long contest until we told him. He hadn't looked at the file (which he'd had since the day before) or anything. So he asks for a brief adjournment, to talk to the witnesses, and then disappears. For half a bloody hour.
We finally started the case shortly before one pm (which is when lunch starts). We got through half the victim's evidence before she needed a break, and I bolted over to the supermarket for a frozen vegetable pastie and a packet soup (thanks be to microwaves!). The afternoon went pretty well, with the usual defence tactic of discrediting the victim, and then two more of the prosecution's five witnesses. Meanwhile, Peter managed to clear most of tomorrow's list, and we'll be continuing the case then.
It's interesting, really, this case. The accused was a friend of the victim, staying with her in the bungalow out the back of her house after separating from his wife. He says they actually had a sexual relationship, and that she has fabricated the assault story out of jealousy of his new (Internet) relationship. She denies this completely, saying she has never had sex with him, and that he was pursuing her despite her rebuffals: the incident in question involved him throwing her onto her bed, pushing up her shirt and undoing her bra and kissing her breasts. The accused looks like a retired book keeper, and the victim is a large woman (also divorced) possibly in her early forties. To me, it's a situation of two sad, lonely people, and one of them is under some kind of delusion about the other. Which one, though, remains to be seen. I'm waiting for the rest of the evidence tomorrow.
I had another of those interesting chats with Mr Hardy (the magistrate), he who calls our Prime Minister The Pissant (almost as good as The Gnome, IMO). He was talking about job-related stress, and why he feels less stressed as a magistrate than he did as a defence lawyer. It was, he told me, about control. As a lawyer, he had no control - the decision was in the hands of the judicial members he appeared before, and all he could do was give his clients as good a chance as he could. As a magistrate, he has a degree of that control. I had to agree with him about that - the most stressful times of my job are when things are going pear-shaped, and I can't do anything about it. It's the solicitors, the police, the defendants and applicants and witnesses, and the magistrates themselves: it's like herding cats in the dark, sometimes.
I readily admit to being something of a control freak. It's part of the Eldest Child Syndrome (ECS). *winks at Yas and promises to explain that one to everyone else some other time* What I hate most is not having control over my life, feeling helpless and frustrated. ECS is also why I hate seeing my friends in trouble, and not being able to help them - I need to be useful, and I have a large nurturing streak.
But I'm distracting myself.
I think what's driving me nuts the most about this year is the feeling of not being entirely in control - too many decisions seem to have been made for me, or by me but for the sake of other people. It's why, I think, I need my own space so much, to live on my own for a while and not have to factor in other people as much as I have. In thirty years, I've never really lived on my own - the closest I got was in college, and there was always someone next door or down the hall or whatever. And I didn't have to make my own meals. *grins*
I remembered a quote on my ride home tonight, thinking this over: "I'd rather be alone for the right reasons, than with someone for the wrong ones." It's paraphrased from Some Kind Of Wonderful, one of those John Hughes Eighties teen flicks. It's a personal favourite of mine, along with The Breakfast Club.
At this moment, that quote holds true for me. I'd rather be right, and strong, then wrong and weak. Because that kind of decision is not only harmful to me, it hurts the person I'm with, be it BRM or Michael or even my parents. It gives me too many excuses to shy away from the hard decisions, gives me a scapegoat for the bad ones. And if I'm going to be the kind of person people think I am, then it's up to me to stop taking the easy path of excuses and justifications and prevarication.
***
Since I didn't do this last Sunday (being on my way back from Melbourne in a stressed-out Mini), here's this week's Gratitude Journal:
Five Things I'm Grateful For:
1) That I got to see Yasmin, even if it wasn't for long, and that I'll be able to see her again next week before I fly out.
2) The amazing sunset I watched Sunday evening, driving home.
3) That BRM isn't the type of person to leave me with nothing when he leaves at the end of the year, and that we're able to talk about stuff like property division without the bullshit I see in court.
4) The yummy packet Tom Yum (*chuckles* sounds like a Mel thing) soup I got from the supermarket today for lunch.
5) The way people feel they can talk to me about what's bothering them, and ask my advice, even though I may not have a clue. ;)
***
Getting on for dinner time, and this post is already huge. I'll catch you later. :)
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
John Hughes movies
Date: 2001-07-17 05:25 am (UTC)I wasn't quite a teenager when they came out, but I consistantly walked out of them going, "Did this guy read my diary or what?"
It's rare that you find a director with such empathy.
These days, nearly nonexistant.
And the quote, of course, is right.
Being alone sucks, but it doesn't suck as much as being in a doomed relationship that you're only going through the motions of.
I always loved that quote...
Date: 2001-07-17 12:18 pm (UTC)As far as the Breakfast Club goes -- you've got good taste in movies ::grins:: I love that one too.