deathpixie: (holding on)
[personal profile] deathpixie
Day 02 - Your first love

At one point, while I was seeing the World's Worst Psychotherapist, she went on vacation for a couple of weeks and I saw her back-up. On our first visit, we talked for a bit, and then he asked me, completely out of the blue: "How old were you when you first fell in love?"*

I was thirteen and in my second year of high school, the year things started going bad. His name was Michael. He had curly dark brown hair and clear blue eyes and a smattering of freckles over tanned skin. He was stocky - broad shouldered and not overly tall - and the other boys called him "Podge". And he, out of everyone in my class, was the only one who didn't make my life hell. He was sweet and kind and funny and I adored him. For his part, he wasn't really aware I was there, except as a friend. Then again, he wasn't really interested in any of the girls.

Are we sensing a trend here?

I carried that torch for Michael all through high school. In Year 11, I summoned up the courage to ask him to be my partner for our debutante ball (it's a country thing, don't ask), and beyond all my expectations, he said yes. I remember one night at practice, we both had the interview for the Rotary Club's exchange program afterwards, and both of us were shaking and laughing about it. He got the exchange, but the Rotary Club offered me a consolation prize of a year in Japan with another group, coincidentally the same country Michael wound up going to. I don't know what made me happier, knowing I was spending a year in a foreign country or knowing that Michael would still be in my year level when I got back. We wrote to each other during that year, sharing experiences and issues and we became actual friends, something that continued through to our last year of school.

I still wonder what happened to him. He applied for the Air Force, but failed the asthma test on the second-last level (they hit you with histamines of increasing levels to see if you'll have an attack. He did with one left to go) and it devestated him - the Air Force had been his dream all through high school. The last I heard about him was that he had trained as an ambulance driver. I google him sometimes, but his name's almost as common as mine, so it hasn't been terribly productive. But I'll always remember his smile and the way he was with people, comfortable and soothing, and I wish him all the best, wherever he is.

*And yes, my concept of love and relationships is very much coloured by the fact I had an unrequited crush on the nicest boy in school for six years. I am literally a hopeless romantic.



Day 01 - Introduce Yourself
Day 02 - Your first love
Day 03 – Your parents
Day 04 – What you ate today
Day 05 – Your definition of love
Day 06 – Your day
Day 07 – Your best friend
Day 08 – A moment
Day 09 – Your beliefs
Day 10 – What you wore today
Day 11 – Your siblings
Day 12 – What’s in your bag
Day 13 – This week
Day 14 – What you wore today
Day 15 – Your dreams
Day 16 – Your first kiss
Day 17 – Your favorite memory
Day 18 – Your favorite birthday
Day 19 – Something you regret
Day 20 – This month
Day 21 – Another moment
Day 22 – Something that upsets you
Day 23 – Something that makes you feel better
Day 24 – Something that makes you cry
Day 25 – A first
Day 26 – Your fears
Day 27 – Your favorite place
Day 28 – Something that you miss
Day 29 – Your aspirations
Day 30 – One last moment

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