Dilemmas, dilemmas...
Oct. 9th, 2001 08:12 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
deathpixieI need your advice here guys. I've been thinking over things over the past week or so, and I find myself at something of a crossroads.
Let me explain.
It concerns my plans for next year. Back in August, after I got back from Dexcon, I made the decision to go back to Melbourne next year. The problem is, I also want to go to Europe with certain ficcers, and then to Dexcon and stay in Canada for as long as I can afford before they throw me out. At least four months. To that end, I was intending to go back to full time work in Melbourne and save as much as possible.
This is where the dilemma comes in.
I don't think I can afford both - living in Melbourne and saving up for travel. Living on your own in the city is pricey, and I really don't like the idea of living with strangers. Here I get a two-bedroom unit for minimal rent - $500 a month. And the general cost of living is cheaper. There's also the fact I'd have to come up with bond and first month's rent and connection fees for various utilities, none of which I'm going to have by January.
The other point is that work really doesn't want me to leave. John Hardy is sticking his neck out to get me put on full time ASAP, and seems really keen on me staying, as was the temporary regional registrar in charge. There's also talk of a VPS-3 position being available (although I'd be fighting Paula for it) next year. And the added bonus of doing Coroner's and County Court work, getting the experience I need to rise in the department. If I transfer, I'm pretty much guanranteed to get stuck in another dead-end job like I was at Melbourne Magistrates': I certainly wouldn't be doing as much as I do here, nor would I be as valued.
Of course, those of you who have been reading my journal will be shaking your heads and thinking I'm on crack after the general ranting and raving I've been doing about Wodonga. Yes, I have no friends here. Yes, I've been pretty miserable for the past nine months. But a large part of that has been living with my ex. That would change next year - I'd insist on it. And a lot od my loneliness has been self-inflicted. When I'm depressed I get lazy, and disinclined to be social. I would also be working full time, therefore having less time to sit and mope. Besides, I wouldn't be so reluctant to invite people home if BRM wasn't around to disapprove later.
*grins* And I'd get to keep the sofa bed for a bit longer.
So, my dilemma is this: common-sense vs. personal wishes. If I stay here until June, it means I won't be able to get back to training, or see the Melbourne ficcers as much as I would living there. It means another six months of not much in the way of social life unless I get off my bum and seek it out. I know my parents would be happier if I stay, and it would be easier as far as actual moving goes - I would get to keep my brother's stuff that is here, and when I go, I wouldn't have to pay for storage, just leave it with my folks. There's a whole bunch of practical reasons to stay, and not that many to go, except that my friends aren't here. And I don't know that moving back to Melbourne will be any better - I don't even know if I'd be able to get the time off I want, while I know Pete would do his best to look after me here.
So, the advisor is asking for advice. You guys are good at giving me a different perspective on things, and I could do with that now - I've been thinking this over and over, and I'm getting more and more muddled. Some fresh views would be welcome.
Let me explain.
It concerns my plans for next year. Back in August, after I got back from Dexcon, I made the decision to go back to Melbourne next year. The problem is, I also want to go to Europe with certain ficcers, and then to Dexcon and stay in Canada for as long as I can afford before they throw me out. At least four months. To that end, I was intending to go back to full time work in Melbourne and save as much as possible.
This is where the dilemma comes in.
I don't think I can afford both - living in Melbourne and saving up for travel. Living on your own in the city is pricey, and I really don't like the idea of living with strangers. Here I get a two-bedroom unit for minimal rent - $500 a month. And the general cost of living is cheaper. There's also the fact I'd have to come up with bond and first month's rent and connection fees for various utilities, none of which I'm going to have by January.
The other point is that work really doesn't want me to leave. John Hardy is sticking his neck out to get me put on full time ASAP, and seems really keen on me staying, as was the temporary regional registrar in charge. There's also talk of a VPS-3 position being available (although I'd be fighting Paula for it) next year. And the added bonus of doing Coroner's and County Court work, getting the experience I need to rise in the department. If I transfer, I'm pretty much guanranteed to get stuck in another dead-end job like I was at Melbourne Magistrates': I certainly wouldn't be doing as much as I do here, nor would I be as valued.
Of course, those of you who have been reading my journal will be shaking your heads and thinking I'm on crack after the general ranting and raving I've been doing about Wodonga. Yes, I have no friends here. Yes, I've been pretty miserable for the past nine months. But a large part of that has been living with my ex. That would change next year - I'd insist on it. And a lot od my loneliness has been self-inflicted. When I'm depressed I get lazy, and disinclined to be social. I would also be working full time, therefore having less time to sit and mope. Besides, I wouldn't be so reluctant to invite people home if BRM wasn't around to disapprove later.
*grins* And I'd get to keep the sofa bed for a bit longer.
So, my dilemma is this: common-sense vs. personal wishes. If I stay here until June, it means I won't be able to get back to training, or see the Melbourne ficcers as much as I would living there. It means another six months of not much in the way of social life unless I get off my bum and seek it out. I know my parents would be happier if I stay, and it would be easier as far as actual moving goes - I would get to keep my brother's stuff that is here, and when I go, I wouldn't have to pay for storage, just leave it with my folks. There's a whole bunch of practical reasons to stay, and not that many to go, except that my friends aren't here. And I don't know that moving back to Melbourne will be any better - I don't even know if I'd be able to get the time off I want, while I know Pete would do his best to look after me here.
So, the advisor is asking for advice. You guys are good at giving me a different perspective on things, and I could do with that now - I've been thinking this over and over, and I'm getting more and more muddled. Some fresh views would be welcome.
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
Uhmmm...
Date: 2001-10-10 12:02 am (UTC)I'd really like to have you come with us to Europe. And I'm a hardline tightarse when it comes to really ~really~ having somthing to save for.
But, like you say, it's horrible not having friends.
But, if you put the effort in, there's probably a few groups of people out there (harrass the rude comicshop guy, see about RPG, bushwalking groups, riding, whatever).
But, it's tough dealing with BRM.
But, if you want I'll come down next weekend and throw his stuff into the road and help you change the locks, because, honey, you so don't need to put up with him. You give him more patience than he deserves.
But, country towns can be stifling.
But, you might have a better job/job prospects to come back to.
But, you need a good karate group.
But, but but but but.
Whatever makes you happy. Because a happy Rossi is very important.